Baby News and Fertility Issues

After reading one of my favorite blogger’s post about her issues with fertility, I decided it was time to speak up and bring awareness to my own. A few years ago, I touched on my concerns with my reproductive problems in a previous post but now am at a better place to speak in depth about it. In September of 2011, I got what I deemed to be the worst news that I possibly could get in my life. Move forward to 2015 and hearing the nurse tell us that my grandmother had passed definitely tops that list but I digress.

Hearing “You have a very low percentage of being able to have a baby” at that time was literally dropping a nuclear bomb on me. I remember sitting at my desk at work, too stunned to even utter a sound. I just looked at the phone like it was an alien object and then proceeded to hang up on my physician.

Let me backtrack a bit though……

In 2011 I was 29 and had just started a new job. A new job at a new company with new benefits aka medical insurance. With that new insurance, I had to drop my regular gyno (yes I call them gynos) and get a new one. While perusing my new insurance providers site, I found a gyno office around the corner from my office so it was only natural that I choose them. And that I did. I called, made my appointment, and went to that said appointment for my routine twice a year PAP smear.

You read that right. Twice annually. Why? Because my cervix loved “cancerous” cells and I had to make sure we stalked them until they went away. More about that another day.

Come to find out that this new gyno practice was also one of the most renowned fertility clinics in the DC area. So my doctor went above and beyond with my PAP. During the manual portion of the procedure, he noticed something “off”. He asked me about my periods (regular) and pain (non-existent). Because fertility is his expertise and I was 29, he decided that an ultrasound would do my body good and better determine what was “off” from his findings.

Well what was off is that my left ovary is the size of a pea. And yes I am exaggerating BUT compared to the awesome righty, it was teeny tiny. That sent alarm bells off in his doctor head and he ordered blood tests for me. A week later, I got the CALL that scared the living crap out of me.

Basically- I suffer from DOR ( Diminished Ovarian Reserves). Every woman is born with a certain amount of eggs. Guys reproduce those little swimmers daily but we women, not so much! Once they are done, those suckers are done. Elvis Eggs have left the building done! At 29, I basically had the eggs of a 40 year old. And I freaked the F out!

I have never been the girl who saw herself getting married but I always wanted to be a mother. I could not see myself committing to a man for the rest of my life but was openly welcome to being a parent. I am pretty phenomenal with kids and well they love me! (let me toot my own horn just a tad!) But anyway…… When I heard this news, it made me feel like my life was over. I contemplated trying to have a baby right then and there no matter how financially and mentally unstable I was at that point of life. I wanted the chance to have my baby gosh darn it! But these things called sanity and logic kinda won me over and here I am… baby less lol.

While there are some “treatments” for DOR, there really is not much to do but plan ahead. It is about conserving the eggs you do have and freezing them for the time that a baby is in the plan. Freezing and storing cost a small fortune though (15-20k). I was so gung ho for the remainder of 2011 on doing everything possible to ensure that I would have a baby. I read everything. I started eating better. I barely drank alcohol. I joined every support group there was etc. But the emotional and psychological toll on me was high. I started doubting my worth and value as a woman. If I cannot bear children then what is my purpose. It took a long time for me to be comfortable with the fact that it may NOT be a possibility for me to have my own natural children but I am open to other possibilities like adoption or using donor eggs.

Here I am now at 33 and am very comfortable with my reality. I am without a doubt a true believer that if God wants this for me, that it will happen at the right time. Although I probably have made poor decisions, my faith does not allow me to doubt Him.

So to get to the point because I know yall are over reading…….

I am writing this because I was a woman with regular periods. Like clockwork regular ass periods. I did not suffer from fibroids. I never miscarried. I didn’t have pregnancy scares. But at 29 I found out that my eggs were depleting and there was nothing I could really do about it and better yet, there was no known reason for this to happen to me. It is not hereditary or genetic. I was not exposed to any lead or radiation. I just have a mini bag of eggs instead of the Costco big bag…..

But I believe in awareness so—-

I sincerely urge every woman in their mid twenties to test out your fertility. With all the processed foods we eat and the poisons we put in our bodies, you never know what it is doing to your fertility. While DOR is not necessarily caused by that, you never know what else is causing your reproductive system to run amok. Even if you have regular periods and feel fine- it does not hurt to get a little look at your ovaries and test your eggs. Of course you should consult with your insurance provider prior but I believe this is something all women should do if children are a goal of yours!

I am so thankful that I went to this gyno because I have learned so much and am grateful that I was able to find this out before all my eggs are in fact gone. So… thank you to all the fine folks over at Columbia Fertility and Associates!

Thank you so much for reading and I wish you all a very happy Wednesday!