So recently, like less than a week ago I decided to big chop and embrace my natural hair. Almost every single one of my friends were discouraging me for months about it because they know my laziness when it come to my tresses. I just do not like to do it! I want to spend no more than 10 minutes daily on my locks. Anything more and it gets the frown face like a full time job!
But on August 2, I walked myself into Alisa of Cosmo Crush’s salon, sat in her chair and said, “lets do this mannnnn” (in my Chris Tucker voice). I am so thankful and lucky to have a hair dresser who cares about hair health over hair trends. She is ready to help me along this journey and that is the absolute most important part. Get you an Alisa ASAP!
Rewind about 5 days prior when I think God came down himself and struck me with an epiphany wand. I was sitting on my couch with the beau and really thinking about my newfound weight gain, (33lbs) and it hit me that I was not working out as much because I hated doing my hair after. With weekly social events to attend, I am always worried about how I will look. And that irritated my whole soul. The fact that my vanity and slothfulness was keeping me from being healthy was the last straw.
I have never really been into looks. Of course I believe in looking your best but I have never been the person who needed a lot of makeup, certain clothes, plastic surgery etc to feel good about myself. I still very much feel that a great person looks way better than a not great person. But the fact that my hair was holding me back from a lot in life made me feel really bad about myself. This was NOT the best Jennifer I strived to be and I made the decision then and there to go for it.
I would love to say that I chose to big chop and embrace my natural hair in order to be closer to my culture but that would be a bold face lie. I did it for a couple of reasons.
- After reconnecting with my biological father and realizing what my ethnic background is, I was curious to see the state of my hair texture.
- I no longer wanted to hold on to my hair over being healthy and getting a good sweat in 4 times a week.
- I realized I was WAY too tied to my hair and my looks. Given that I have gained a ton of weight, I put so much emphasis on my face and hair in order to feel good. I was going with the long hair not only because it was easy and not only because I did want it for my photo shoots in the desert but because it hid some of my body and made me feel smaller. I was trapping myself in this prison of my own making and I was NOT going for it.
The minute Alisa cut off the relaxed ends (about 3.5 inches worth), my hair sprang to life. Or maybe it was the curls being released from the weight of the straight ends and finally able to dance freely but regardless it was a happy moment! Alisa and I both were CERTAIN that my hair was wavy. When we saw actual curls, our faces morphed into big ole smiles. Hair texture really does not mean much to me but it was just a very interesting surprise and something extra to add to my journey.
We decided to rod set my hair so that I could get used to it with a low manipulation style. Once it was dry and we were plucking it out, I wasn’t sure of the girl in the mirror. Sure I had short hair before. Really short. Completely shaved at the sides and back type short hair but the girl with the curls and teeny pouff was new to me. I kinda panicked initially and wanted something more familiar. So then I asked her to cut down the sides for me. Kinda mohawky and I felt better. Until I got home and again freaked internally. But it was short lived once I started running my fingers through it and playing with it.
Seeing those curls spring to life with just a few drops of water had me excited and rejuvenated. Now I kinda have an obsession with that. I love adding product and seeing them pop.
And that brings me to my issue.
I know not a gosh darn thing about natural hair.
I have so many products I was sent by PR companies back in the day and don’t know where to start.
Whats a curl pudding vs a curl activator?
Do I want gel or edge control?
Is a wash and go really just wash and run out of the house or do you put product in it?
Do I need to co-wash or can I use shampoo?
Am I a Shea Moisture girl or a Cantu beauty chick?
AHHHHH my mind is racing but its oh so fun!
So to all my veterans out there-
Talk to me and guide me. Help me navigate this natural hair road as lazily as possible (heehee)
And what on Gods Green Earth do I do once the rod set comes out?
So in the end the reason I decide to big chop is because I did not like the woman I was becoming. I ddi not like my unhealthy attachment to my hair and I did not like the fact that I was choosing looks over health. It also irked me that I was choosing to stay relaxed only because I did not want to deal with a new challenge. I also hated the fact that I was looking at my beau and wondering- will he still love me with these curls? LIKE seriously WTF!
I worked far too hard to better myself and to gain a sense of self that is healthy to allow something like hair to derail me!
This was by far one of the ABSOLUTE best decisions I have ever made and Im so happy that my hair guru was a part of it!
All tops worn in this post are from Zara.
Full detailed outfit post coming soon!
Okay, booooo lol. I was one of those friends that said YES do this! You look great by the way! Hair can grown back!
yes I think you are the ONLY besides my sis to say go for it hahah
Your hair looks great! No matter what style you have it in you exude elegance and show confidence all at the same times….and maybe a little bit of sexiness thrown in there too, lol.
thank you thank you thank you
Oooooooo I LOVE! LUV!! LOOOOVVVEEEEE!!!! Like a whole lot, did I say LOVE the new hair and new found inside love of your head of curls.
Every natural girl has a different journey. Be prepared to try multiple products until you find what works for you and your tresses. Start with samples until you are sure or swap/borrow from your other natural girlfriends to test out look, feel, smell etc. to start your journey. Know that your curls will switch up on you based on the weather so you will need different products for different season and reasons. There are blogs galore for natural hair ladies. (shameless plug for daughter IG @mamaskitchenandcurls) Welcome to the natural curly hair side my sister. Hit me up anytime for questions.
Thank you so much Shelena! So far its been a fun and stressful journey but I pray I stick to it hahahah. I really appreciate ALL of your suggestions and tips and tricks. We are going to cut off the rest of the hair at the top so its going to be different again. Pray for me lol
Hey love! You look amazing in short hair and I love your curls. My story is so similar to yours. I have been natural and short for a few years and then decided to fit in but going long, with protective styles and all even though I didn’t go back to relaxing. I gained a lot of weigh too and in mind I keep telling myself I will not look good with short hair with my new big face lol. I keep going back and forth on whether I should go short again or wait till i loose them weight. My other issues are really not truly knowing how to take of my short hair. I used to have it really short so I didn’t need to do much, but now I would love a twa etc… but I’m not sure I can make it work… thinking time, knowledge and money. Thanks for dusting your experience and motivating me to just go for it… maybe. Lol
Edwige | http://www.hypnozglam.com
Thats how I feel! But thank you sooooo much for writing and reading 🙂
I love the curls. My hair is curly when wet but then turns very frizzy as it dries and looks like a nappy fro. What products do you use? I wouldn’t mind wearing my hair more natural if I could get the curls to stay and look moisturized and soft.